The biggest regret I never want to have is to live my life in a way that isn’t mine.
Sometimes, staying still is the best option, when every move forward you could possibly take will cost you more than you can afford to pay.
Freeze, and let time do what it does best; passing by.
I was not kidding when I said that 2018 will be a health-focused year. I’ve been reexamining the way I eat, the way I sleep, what activities I engage in, even what products I use to wash and groom myself.
I have been mindful of my mental state and actively avoiding stressful thinking. I no longer bring work back home with me. If I had more work, I simply stayed later at work and finished it, but made sure I left early or on time the next day.
I am careful of the chemicals that I use to clean and groom myself. My goal is to go completely natural. I started with hair care, where I henna to die my hair, oil treatments to condition it and wash my hair with a 100% organic shampoo as infrequently as I can. I am even thinking of not using shampoo at all, but seek out natural alternatives. I also changed my soap bar to a 100% oatmeal and olive oil natural soap. It’s been helping with my eczema. I am slowly switching the rest.
I try to exercise for 30 minutes everyday. Focusing mostly on cardio and healthy heart workouts. I am not interested in extreme muscle toning, resistance training or endurance training. I won’t be running marathons any time soon either. I try to use to my body weight as much as possible to train and stay in shape and walk as often as I can.
I am looking at changing my diet as well. I am not looking to lose weight, but mainly to have the right nutrients and maintain my health and sustain the right energy levels.
This year will not be about growth, as the past years have been. I am accustomed to challenging myself and seeking adversity to push myself to grow, to the point where I neglect myself. Because of that I find it difficult to switch gears; for example, I do not have many recipes that are healthy, and often I find it hard to shop for groceries because what I am used to is no longer what I seek to stay healthy. Another example is that, apart from hitting the treadmill or spinning bike, I do not have a specific workout routine to adhere to.
So I have been doing a lot of research, writing things down, making lists and all sort of trackers until I have adopted different habits and embedded the right routines in my life.
In a way this is growth as well, I imagine.
It feels good to take care of one’s self.
It’s been long overdue.
When you love someone so much, you wish you had met them earlier in your life.
I own a pair of socks, where one sock had a hole in it. The hole is where the big toes is, as is usually the case.
Today, I repaired the hole. I actually sowed it shut myself. The pair of socks was part of a set of 5 I bought from Walmart for cheap. I could have thrown it and bought a new one.
But It felt good to not be wasteful. Everything feels dispensable these days that we don’t take the time to appreciate and take of care what we have. Sometimes, who we have.
I want to live better, and be grateful for what I have in life. Even for my hole-y socks.
There was a moment today where I felt I was making a decision between having a luxurious life and a purposeful life.
I want a purposeful life.
2018 is going to be a year of health;
physically, mentally, and financially.
Tonight feels like a good night to say Good Bye to one’s self.
I often dream about disintegrating into mere consciousness; a floating awareness with no corporeal existence.
What a relief that would be.
I am so eager to finish my degree and start doing other things in my life. My vacation is over and I go back to work today. I am getting in a little late today because I got in on my vacation last week for an hour and half meeting.
I want to finish my degree with flying colours, so that I can move on to other ventures.