I’ve made a decision today to take care of myself first.
I believe I have taken on too much and I am reaching my limit. I had always reached where my limit is as I kept moving forward in my life. I wanted too much, I wanted everything.
In short, initially, I wanted to pursue a diploma in business administration that I had started last year. I did great, except for one class which seems to be affecting my academic standing now, so I would have to struggle a little bit more to obtain this graduate diploma. I decided not to. Last year, I had just gotten married, changed jobs, and have taken on debt in order to pay for my wedding. I do not need any more struggle.
So I decided to switch the diploma to a certificate (for which I had already done all the requirements last semester), and redo two classes in order to have higher grades in order to graduate, and….that’s it. This semester I would have two courses instead of four.
Meaning, I will have my free afternoons back. I get to have some life back to enjoy. I get to come back home and enjoy the beautiful apartment that my husband and I worked hard to put together. I am young, with a husband, with no kids, who is employed, and has her family around her. I think there is no time like now to enjoy life with the ones I love. I already have a diploma in engineering, that I worked very hard for. Why do I need to spend more of my life and money, stuck between four walls in a place where people tell me how smart or not smart I am. Plus, online learning is picking off, and many websites offer what I ever desire to learn for free and at my own convenience.
Today driving back home, from my meeting with the academic adviser, I was thrilled about this beautiful prospective. The idea that things will be lighter and easier. I realized I had a choice this time, and I made the choice to put myself first.
When I came back home, I made myself a delicious burger, followed by a mojito mocktail. Then I gave myself a pedicure and painted my toenails. It feels great.
I am proud of myself for admitting that I need a break and for a making a decision that gives me one.